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FaLL 07 PoEt CiNQuAiNS CONTEST  or look it's an


Exquisite Corpse:
The Revision Version


Currently only by Andrei Codrescu and Susan Kirby-Smith  but YOU could be next.




This is a new type of exquisite corpse. One poet writes words - in this case Andrei wrote the words - then, that poet gives it to another poet, me, who puts in a few line breaks and a few extra words when she feels necessary. Could you be the next poet?

Take the poem below and make some changes on it. Then, either publish on the web yourself and send us the link, or send it back and we'll publish it. Send us your picture too and we'll put it here. You'll look great. Promise.


I saw you on a train and

I can tell by

your typeface and locations

which of your poems are older.

It doesn’t matter: despite the setting

and the font you know the right- wait!

You had the tone in Big Sur

and it came with you to Baton Rouge.

I wish you’d complete a series

of damaged children portraits.

Even when you are funny

you are terrifying. Please

kill the last three lines.

 
In the beginning was the lotsa me and you that didn’t know they were words.
Then came the one who writes titles but must be told what’s up.
What’s up is that it’s this poetry funny that makes poems different.
It’s not Frank’s funny or Brinks’ I-found-it-funny it’s DeWitt funny.
Plus you can see them poemselves making themselves up.
Rock’n roll sex and drugs are not for poetry amateurs and you’re not
but like the movies you do induce a craving for what the poems warn against
and the typed garage-band look makes them even into art so I’d say
that you found the forms equal to the violent education you’ve recorded
and DTD adopt those initials for your po handle tattoo if you don’t already have

 

In Seeing the Future a grownup speaks. He has forgotten nothing, accepts change.
In Old Man On Bench Refuses to Speak the grownup has been substituted for a poet. Oy!
Happily, there are fire engines, muddy paws on welcome mats, swished whiskey.
A serious man sits inside the grownup holding the poet’s head under the faucet.
The water is cold. He will come up quietly speaking foreign languages. Hey.

 

                Tomato.

You will be the only poet

allowed to use exclamation

points in the future.

That’s because your energy is genuine and you are the sister of Vladimir Majakovsky.

You will also be awarded

the Truly-Pays-Attention-To-Her-Circumstances-And-

Does-Not-Fear-to-Thread-Where-the-Mud-is-Thick-

and-the-Emotions-Murky Medal!

And then please work on spacing

your epée hits on the page for maximum bleed!

 

                            SUSAN KIRBY-SMITH.

Fusyform Gyrus, get to work!

            I’m looking at the fully furnished house.

Everything is in place: veggies, medieval

                    towers, thoughts, mirrors, clock.

The house is waiting for the poet to inhabit it fully,

but it’s not a house it’s an ark,

it’s a ruse, it has had its moorings cut

and it became a boat while the poet was out

picking up drifting quotables.

The minute she sets foot in and says, “this is it,” we’re off.

 

                    8.

Benjamin spoke loudly shattering

the glass in the myriad windows

of the false octo-prophet

and what he said was whitmanic and powered

by a rage held back only by its potential

for eco-damage, which is a nice way to feel, way too nice

knowing as you do and we too

that weathers will change us and that

there are several stories in you waiting

to be written without interruption by punk clouds

or cries of help from stranded engineers

(sixth line see you next semester in the trenches of nonfiction)

 
ee

I found Graveyard hard to read: I was inside harsh light facing moving black letters.

For that very reason what came through was poetry, starkness, clean air, essentials.

That light possessed of the same melancholy intrinsic to it and to the speaker diffused

in Winter or in Baton Rouge, Easter 2006, but lost only a little power as urban flotsam

drifted in. A voice speaks through you. Both hands on the wheel, please. Terrific.

 

       10.

Blessed be the Thomist in search of song for he will speak positively

and make good poetry out of things that actually grow from in the earth, i.e, plants.

And fear ye the wrath of the non-chaotic universe for trampling on tender things.

Good work, Jordan, and there will be more. You speak well. You are poet. No 5th line.

 

          Tyler Smith

Thank you for joining the circus. In addition to the squid with eyes bigger than onions

we will witness the magic of the man who said i wanna bronze/my family tree

and then goes ahead and does it through complex dances and songs with a pinch of dread

threaded through by an epic urge unstoppable, and thus, ladies and gentlemen,

from the family the din of dragon-slayers arose and an epic hero stood ready to be born

 

          12.

three voices can be heard here using one mouth

with great energy and demented joy

the voice of love declaring fucking’s a mess lately

without slighting love

the voice of blood amazed and impatient

(superstions are fences to invaders)

& the voice of the terse story-teller who has ripped the wires (adjectives) from her head


FIN.



Movie Brief:    The Puffy Chair

Domineering boyfriend Josh takes her on a wild adventure.

They go to his brother’s house, watch a homemade film

of a garden lizard.

A few towns later, Brother gets married, drunkenly.

             They all fight.

            The woman is particularly upset

that the young man’s brother

treated marriage, the idea

of marriage so wrongfully

   
            They drove home.



New Friend With Blog
A new Friend in Baton Rouge: A friend named Colleen Kane relocated here from Brooklyn and manages the site, BaRou, which stands for, in some fresh new language, "Baton Rouge is the new Brooklyn." BaRou, folks. I agree.



Stolen Pictures of Ellis


This is Ellis Marsalis!

At Snug Harbor!



Where he plays with his trio, that includes his youngest son! Jason Marsalis!







THE WONDERFUL THESIS

I had a thesis on the web somewhere; it's disappeared.




Newspaper Press in Greensboro

May 6, 2006

Today I went to the famous Derby Day Party at the Romine's house in Sunset Hills. I think I bet on the winning horse. Unfortunately I had to leave long before the race to come to work, but that brings me to something I want to say - I want to make a promise:

Tomorrow, when I am going into the gigantic press room to get the first editions hot off the press I am going to secretly take some pictures and then post them the next day. This thing is amazing, the giant press. Your eyes will pop out of your head when you see it. That is my promise. Some days, when collecting the papers,  I have had the urge to throw myself into the press, not to die of course, but just to experience a great physical collision with that huge beautiful machine that prints out thousands of papers. But not tomorrow - I must live another day, if only to post the pictures of the giant press. Perhaps I will even record the sound the press makes and make an audio file and put that online, so that anyone reading can hear and see the press online and feel that they are really there, collecting the newspaper first edition with me, they themselves thinking about hurling their own corpora into the giant press. That is my promise.


 

May 3 2006 (later)

please wait. this may take more time than I thought.


Diary  April 30, 2006

Well, there is lots to tell but I can't yet load many pictures.

I'm staying in the Mission District, a neighborhood deeply Latino but slathered with hipsters.  The buildings are both Victorian and Mexican looking and they range between being elegantly and exquisitely restored to seeming all but condemned. I'm convinced there are more colors here than anywhere else in North America. I visited the splendid community writing center and pirate store, 726 Valencia, also the official McSweeney's store. I went to Yoga Tree and climbed something that I think is called "Bernal Hill" because that's what my friend called it but anytime I say "Bernal Hill" to anyone else they look at me like I am crazy. Perhaps it has another name.

Stay tuned however, for pictures of and commentary on two films from the San Franscisco International Film Festival, an important air guitar competition, a Giant's game, a kletzmer festival in Palo Alto, a genius-toting, city-touring gypsy band and then this year's Northern California Renaissance Conference (not an event at which people dress up in tights, fence and drink mead.) Also, expect some burrito reviews. If you absolutely cannot wait and must know about burritos right now, please proceed here.


For Sarah Rose - The Pig Olympics!

Held in Russia, I believe.



May 3 2006

Yesterday I started trying to explain something. The explanation didn't work out as well as one could have hoped so I've had to go back into books to get into precisely why I enjoy Renaissance literature so much. There are the varying definitions for words - the Oxford English Dictionary becomes one's very best friend. But, the definitions of words only open up if you allow the Elizabethean grammar to hit you at full force. This process can be unconscious but I also want to be able to explain it. So you know that that means?

It's Grammar Day on Unmovable Feast!!!

This day is going to start off with a brief tutorial in word terms. Then, later, after I've had a chance to reread the Sonnets, I'll provide you with my favorite syntax variations.

Here we go.....  

Transitive Verbs - verbs with a direct object (I chastise, love, kiss him.)

Intransitive Verbs - verbs without a direct object (He relents, runs and lives.)

Linking Verbs - verbs that express a state of being, or connects a subject to a predicate nomintative or subject complement (It is, appears, seems to be a ridiculous mess.)

Gerund - a verb that has been made into a noun ends in "-ing" (Breaking things is fun.)

Participle - a verb that serves as an adjective (Smoked salmon, waiting period, transformed birds, nesting newlyweds.)

Infinitive - a verb with "to," serving as any part of speech (To bake, to stuff cookies into one's mouth.)

Personal pronouns - stand in for people or ideas

Nominative/Subject pronouns (It was fun.)

Objective Pronouns (Get him!)

Possessive Pronouns (My book is cool.)

Relative Pronouns - relate to another nound proceeding them in the sentence (my dog that barks, The people who saw us, The food that was delicious.)

Indefinite Pronouns - refer to an unknown subject. (Every place is taken. Many eggs are broken. Both people want the same thing. Someone is smoking. Another is drinking. Someone went to throw up over there. Several years ago I saw you.)

Demonstrative pronouns - refer to specific things or ideas (This is nice, that's the way I'd like to walk, that will be fine.)

Interrogative pronouns - ask a question (Which bicycle would you like? Who is going to be there?)

Reflexive pronouns - refers to the subject (He cleaned himself, I took myself to the station.)

Okay, I'm not sure if all this is necessary but at least I have it for reference.See this tutorial on coordinating and subordinating conjunctions until I get back to finish.


Continuing the Shakespeare Lesson

What makes Shakespearean language so appealing?

1)  Object Verb Inversion! (When the direct object  precedes the verb.)

Full many a glorious morning have I seen! (34.1)

O! How thy worth with manners may I sing (40.1)

Alack! What poverty my muse brings forth,

Those lines that I before have write do lie,

O me! what eyes hath love put in my head,

The sun itself sees not, til heaven clears

O cunning love! with tears thou keep'st me blind,

Your love and pity doth the impression fill

2) Anthimeria! (Substitution of one part of speech for another)

No marvel then, though I mistake my view

3) Hyperbaton! (Altering word order, or separation of words that belong together, for emphasis)

As fast as thou shalt wane, so fast thou growest (11.1)

4) Ellipsis! (Omission of one or more words, which are assumed by the listener or reader)

Thus is his cheek the map of days outworn

These are just my favorites. For more go here.

I would like to explain that sometimes it seems that one of these differences is actually another. Perhaps sometimes they are both, in a similar way that 2(2) can be expressed 2 x 2. Or maybe it's more complicated than that - this is an explanation in progress.

A Bunny and Flowers

I just can't even tell you how thrilled I am about getting a bunny and flowers.

Don't Forget about Donald P. Grady

Ever! http://www.paperrad.org/donald/donald.html

That comic strips goes with a radio play that some love and others (my Aunt, for one) feel creeped out by. Someday I'll put it online for all the world to hear. If you really want a copy though, email me.


May 21, 2006

Susan and Eric's Wedding. Mr and Mrs. Holtz married here;

on Saturday, May 20. It was the best wedding I've ever attended.

It was "in" Old Sheldon Church, which is actually

the ruins of church that dates back to 1748.

Originally called Prince William's Parish Church, it was one of the first Greek Revival structures built in the United States.

It was burned by the British  sometime at the end of the eighteenth century, when the British General Augustine Prevost invaded the Lowcountry. It was rebuilt in 1826, renamed Old Sheldon Church and burned again by General Sherman's Union troops in 1865.

Top 7 Things About Susan and Eric's Wedding (besides the people, of course)


7. Riding the bus to places in a group, being offered beer when boarding and exiting the bus

6. Bluegrass band at the reception

5. Classical musical selections at the wedding

4. Shrimp and Grits

3. Spooky Church Ruins

2. A reading of part of Plato's symposium that flowed right into something by T.S. Eliot, read by an actor named Will

1. Leather couches outside at the reception

_________________________________________________________________________________________



Contest: Guess the Poet.

winner gets a free book.

 Did ye not hear it?--No; 'twas but the wind,
Or the car rattling o'er the stony stret;
On with the dance! let joy be unconfined;
No sleep till morn, when Youth and Pleasure meet
To chase the glowing Hours with flying feet--
But, hark!--that heavy sound breaks in once more,
As if the clouds its echo would repeat;
And nearer, clearer, deadlier than before!
Arm! Arm! and out--it is--the cannon's opening roar!





Who is this woman, you are asking yourself. Well, I will tell you. This woman is Carla Kihlstedt. No, she is not my secret identity. She is a musician in the Bay area. She plays violin,  she plays viola, she sings, she screams. She plays in 2 Foot Yard, The Tin Hat Trio, Charming Hostess and Sleepytime Gorilla Museum. Carla is wonderful. Carla is the embodiment of progress in music. Carla will someday be interviewed on this website. Someday soon. Until then, go to her website to discover the brilliance.

_______________________________________________________________




I can't believe you've gotten this far down this much outdated web page.


if you are dissatisfied please send me something of yours to publish instead.

something witty and charming, something light and airy

shiraz

direct mail to skirby2@lsu.edu



Oh, Just Quit

"Let's quit the debate about whether greenhouse gases are caused by mankind or by natural causes; let's just focus on technologies that deal with the issue," the president said in Pennsylvania.

So, that is probably something I want to think less about. Here is a website I want to think more about.

Here is a movie I'm excited about.

Speaking of movies I just saw Thank You For Smoking and it reminded me of The Big Lebowski, which reminded me of The Big Sleep, or was it Double Indemnity? Those movies in which a strangely appealing man is kidnapped and drugged.



diary Jan 6, 2007

I used to belong to an online group that involved a map. I lived somewhere on this map. Someone saw my profile and sent this:

Hi Susan, I'm, Mike H** also living at Greensboro. I used to teach but had to give it up because of some disabilities from Dioxin damage from Agent Orange while in Vietnam.

I learned to cook from my Grandfather who had a Resturant and than a Lunchenette.

I would like to exchange e-mails with you about Meals etc as I am the Cook. We usually have guests over once or twice a mont, and I am the one who cooks and creates the sauces, soups etc. I learned to Butcher at a young age because my Uncle had a store. So, when I go to shop for meats ...I get what I want.

I would be interested in exchanging recipes with you. I also collect wine, and have my own Agent in France."


an untitled mini-fiction by Susan Kirby-Smith

April 2006

       
 

             The last time Tessa was in a bookstore she had been browsing through the journals, picking up each one to feel its weight and size in her hands. They were all made of covers of old books bound with many pages of off-white paper between them instead of the original pages. Thus, each one was a unique old book on the outside, but with plain paper inside. Impossible any longer to judge a book by its cover - or if you do judge it by its cover whoever wrote on the pages inside the decoy book would only be amused, should he or she know. Those were the kind of thoughts that filled Tessa's brain until there was barely room for meditating on physical strategy for leaving, going home. That meant that she left a half-eaten burrito on the bookshelf somewhere. Not everything can be taken care of, she reasoned as she looked at the woman in the pink shirt and gray sweat pants. Sometimes you leave a burrito in the bookstore, for no great reason at all.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

My Boyfriend

This is my boyfriend. I went to visit him last Saturday at the prestigious institute where he studies human psychology. He's very intelligent and he is known as the alpha male of his research team. He's invited me to come and participate in some of his studies but I'd like to establish myself as a scholar before we join forces. He and I are planning to marry as soon as his next grant comes through.

Short Play: Day of the Pig Nose Bill

Hi. Hey, what are you doing?

 

I'm licking a pig's nose - what do you think?

Don't you think that's a little weird?

Not at all. Why do you ask?

We also think it's a little weird. And we, ourselves, tend to lick a lot of weird things.

I really don't think that it's the least bit strange.

Hi guys. What's going on?

Oh look. It's Uma and Cousin Caroline.

Uma, Cousin Caroline - don't you think it's a little strange to lick a pig's nose, in public anyway?

We don't really have an opinion on that. Sorry. But we think that the spectacle of it is getting in the way of our fabulouslessness so we beg you to please stop for a while and the rest of you, we beg you to cease your talk. Smooches! We have to find Bill.

9-03-06

Another Ernesto Story Blows Into Paper

       Yesterday copy editors nationwide had just recovered from the downpour of stories on the storm formerly known as Hurricane Ernesto. There was a lull, a calm. Some of the media specialists were anticipating finally going home to their families after long days of being pummeled by articles about wind, rain and floods. Then, late last night news services covering the tropical depression struck again, hitting as many as 95 medium-sized papers in the Southern states. Details of damage rained in from Norfolk, VA, where copy editors there had also experienced a devastating amount of weather reportage that weekend. “When will the deluge end?” night editors messaged each other furiously, all of them dreading the wires’ raging stream of storm information. One North Carolina copy desk chief, Ned Grossman, of the Lukesville Journal said that his employees had been working around the clock and that stories about Ernesto had saturated his paper's intranet to the point that it was no longer working. “We’ve been wading through them for days and days and it finally took us out,” he said. “It’s a small paper,” he said. “We can’t endure that much.” The Journal hopes to reopen after the storm, and the articles about the storm subside, but the damage to the computers and the stress of the employees has been considerable and may require federal aid.

If Greensboro put out a personal ad based on recent city rankings:

Very giving, fairly intoxicated, somewhat smoky and stressed out. Not bothered by traffic, not too employable or business doing. Would be happy in case of pregnancy. Very angry and not too datable.

June 17, 2006

Porch Party

Yesterday I went to a "porch party" for unnattached young ladies and gentlemen. The party was on the porch of a grand old house, the Grimsley House, which is on a hill overlooking Fischer Park and the whole thing was arranged by a lady named Prudy. Walking up to the party I told my friend I was actually ashamed about how excited I was about the porch party. I'd never been invited to a porch party. And I thought it might be sort of like Cotillion, where you know you are not going to fall madly in love with some dashing and unbearably polite soul but you are thrilled that someone is willing it, and that perhaps you should have been wearing white gloves, should have curled your hair or something and maybe someone will offer me lemonade and pink-frosted cookies!  I was half-expecting to have cookies and lemonade brought to me by a distinguished young man wearing a tie, but there were no ties. Nor lemonade nor cookies. And I did not have any white gloves.  Someone did bring me a glass of red wine though, and a vodka tonic. And people wore collared shirts at least. (that is, the men)  There was some time of awkward chatting and drinking before the food, and then more afterwards. I met several lawyers. The end. Oh, not the end - the host told us we were free to have monthly meetings on her porch but "singles only!" Think of it! To have a porch party every month! But the regulation brought us to the question of, "what is the point?" It can't be to commiserate about being single, can it? What a way to ruin an otherwise nice porch party. And what if you became un-single with somebody you met at the porch party. Would you be barred from future porch parties? Would you carry on in secret? Also, would it be wrong to bring a date to the porch party? Does "unattached" mean legally or spiritually? Have I, by going to the porch party, made some sort of pledge to put it before all other endeavors, dating or otherwise? Oh, Porch Party, why must you rage against me with your jealousy?

June 18, 2006

While I am at porch parties my cousin is meeting Uma Thurman on a cruise.

the non-Uma one is my dear and brilliant cousin Caroline - go here for details on how she met her new BFF.

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everything anywhere copyright 2006, 2007, 2008